Men~Women~Sex

A very good blogging friend has asked me to submit a guest post to his blog....

I finally managed to get around to it...

  you may read it here....

~D~

~Happy Valentines Day to All~

~Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine~  

~If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?~

~Grow old with me!  The best is yet to be~

~A man is not where he lives, but where he loves~

 ~Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired~

~Love is a symbol of eternity.  It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end~

~Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker~

~We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love~

~Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart~ 

~If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden~

~Sometimes we make love with our eyes. Sometimes we make love with our hands. Sometimes we make love with our bodies.  Always we make love with our hearts~

Relationships & Roller-coaster Rides!

Up..down, a quick around, a sharp turn left, a sharp turn right, traveling blindly into a tunnel ahead, leading to an instant dead drop...this is a vague, but direct description of two things we experience in life.

One being on a roller-coaster ride the other being in a relationship.

Both rides clearly have a beginning and an ending...yet are still somewhat unpredictable and uncontrollable, this is why they are so hard to resist and so innately tempting to our psyche.

Both rides deliver a chemical reaction that is so addictive and irresistible to our adrenaline, that no matter how scary or unpleasant it seems at times, we continue to return for more.

Neither can offer security or promise, they do however offer the thrill of the unknown, the desire to fulfill a dare or a fantasy and most of all the ability to overcome certain challenges we face through nature and our own subconscious weakness known as 'fear'.

Relationships and roller-coaster rides can be extreme experiences in life. The need for your own balance and inner strength to be able to deal with its twists and turns is vital to the outcome of the ride. If you are too weak, you will loose control and all self-stability in your life. If you are too strong and have no fear whatsoever...your taking the ride for granted, your letting your guard down and without warning, you will end up shocked when it ends unexpectedly.

Read more »

To Love or not To Love..

To Love....

Oh to fall in love.... The feelings one experiences when falling in love..are not only completely consuming and captivating, they are also amazingly surreal, euphoric, passionate, and oh so full of anticipation and newness that there is no escape. You become imprisoned to these overwhelming feelings that trap your mind, heart and body on this merry-go-round of what seems to be a promise of eternal happiness.

When that love is lost for whatever reason, every one of those positive feelings turns swiftly into the total opposite, which can be the most painful experience a human mind can accept and/or absorb.

You will feel like you have literally died inside... become blinded to any direction in life...you will feel as if you have been robbed of a priceless human gem, known as trust...robbed of a love, you deserved...one you earned ...one you depended on for that eternal happiness...one that was yours and no-one elses.

What is there to do once that love is lost?
You can pick up the pieces of your broken world of eternal happiness and you can learn from it and begin to rebuild what once was or you can stay broken and stop breathing...then die.

To never know any of those feelings good or bad...is the other part of my pondering thought...

Not to Love...

Is it better ...

..to never walk for fear of falling?

..to never taste for fear of distaste?

..to never touch for fear of feeling?
..to never smile for fear of frowning?
..to never laugh for fear of crying?

..to never swim for fear of drowning?

..to never trust for fearing of not trusting?

..to never love for fear of losing ?

I wonder...do we even have the choice, to love or not to love?
Do we choose to fall in love or does love choose us? 
Can one go about life, interacting with other people and never face the risk of falling in love? 

Is it so out of our control, that even the knowledge of the risk involved becomes meaningless within the desires of love?

Is love inevitable?

~~~~~~~~

So tell me...do you think...it is better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all ?

~D~

Control....

...exactly who is controlling who?

I have a few questions that will most definitely stir up some deep inner thoughts! They will also give you an idea of just how controlling your relationship is or could be. No one likes to be in a relationship where they feel controlled by their partner, it is very unhealthy and usually ends up being very unhappy. There truly is a fine line between love and hate when there is a controlling partner in the relationship. The only person that we have any right to control is ourselves!

Life is too short to settle for anything especially when it comes to relationships. There is way to much to risk when it comes to matters of the heart. For warned is for armed...I have always believed that fact to be very true. Relationships are one of the most valued parts of our lives and we invest a lot of our minds and souls into them. So why would you not want to be 100% prepared before you take that initial step into waters that could be so treacherous and overwhelming?

How many people fall for another instantly because of looks or a social atmosphere at the time? Too many.

So to have a list of questions to ponder will not only awaken what is going on in your relationship right now, but they will also be very effective in preparing you for what you should not ignore or settle with in your future relationships.

These questions are designed to challenge your.......

WOMEN....What We Are....

WOMEN are a good thing!

WOMEN are soft!

WOMEN are sensuous!

WOMEN are sexy!

WOMEN are sweet tasting!

WOMEN are fun to play with!

WOMEN are pleasing to the eye!

WOMEN are strong & independent!

WOMEN are child bearers!

WOMEN are survivors!

WOMEN are much needed mates!

WOMEN are an emotional species!

WOMEN are the passion of men!

WOMEN are beautiful to men!

WOMEN challenge men!

WOMEN are temptresses!

WOMEN are curvaceous!

WOMEN are mistresses!

WOMEN are wives!

WOMEN are sisters!

WOMEN are friends!

WOMEN are bitches!

WOMEN are behind every successful man! (wink)

WOMEN are what make men tick!
WOMEN are what make men proud!

WOMEN are comfort!

WOMEN bleed!

WOMEN cry!

WOMEN are like the ocean. When they feel loved, their self esteem rises and falls like the waves of an ocean at its wildest time. A woman`s ability to accept and return her love is usually a reflection of how she sees herself. If a woman sees herself as happy and sexy, her arms and heart are wide open. When she sees herself as down and plain, she falls into a pit of darkness and numbness. During this time an open mind and heart is much needed to be on the receiving end. Then, and only then can she rise up and feel all the love that is within her and be of pure radiant love and intimacy.

WOMEN tend to feel deep emotions, such as insecurity, worry, resentment, hopelessness, mistrust, control, disapproval, possessiveness, need, confusion, overwhelmed and a total failure. The more support that a woman connects with, the more her trust grows inside her and releases all the negative emotions that her chemical hormones plant inside her.

WOMEN yearn, for understanding, respect, devotion, reassurance, a soft touch of his lips to be cared for, to be admired, to feel equal leverage, and to feel loved genuinely.

WOMEN love to find their space through simple things such as: reading a book, listening to music, work in a garden, exercise (wink), get a massage, write a journal, watch a chick flick, take a bubble bath with lots of candles, chat with a girlfriend for a long time, go shopping, take a long walk, have a nice glass of wine, please their partner (wink), or simply just curl up on the couch and dream.

WOMEN are the heart of a relationship, they are the fantasy, they are the flower, the candles, the wine, the soft romantic music, the sexy outfit, the pleasure of joining as one, and they are the sweet smell of nature.

WOMEN are what men yearn for!

WOMEN are what men live for!

WOMEN are what men fall for!

WOMEN are what men kill for!

WOMEN are what men plan for!

WOMEN are what men fight for!

WOMEN are what men change for!

WOMEN are what nurture men!

WOMEN are what love men!

WOMEN are what relieve men!

WOMEN are what softens men!

WOMEN are what makes a man tick!

WOMEN are what a man NEEDS!

WOMEN are a Gift from God!

WOMEN complete men!

As much as women can be confusing, emotional, misguiding, clever, conniving, frustrating, crazy, annoying, downright nasty at times, cold, detached, and at times freaky, men have a way of just by a touch or a word to reach out and make them feel safe and loved.

I am proud to be the WOMEN in my mans life!

Are you?

~D~

Give The Gift Of Self-Esteem For Christmas

It is definitely moving in on us like a wonderful winter storm.
Christmas is just around the corner and we all know what that means.
It means that we have to think and re-think about what to get him and her, for Christmas.
It means that our energy levels will be stretched way out. With all the preparations and money spending that we all will be involved with, one thing is certain.
A kind word to boost our self-esteem and Christmas cheer will be more than welcomed by all. I have always been a firm believer in the fact that everyone loves to have a self-esteem boost. Even the most confident appearing person needs a little feel good nudge now and then.
If your piggy bank is low on jingle, or if you just do not know what to get that special someone for Christmas, why not try to just make them feel good about themselves. While shopping for that special gift, choose something that will send a self-esteem thought. A thought to just tell them that you are thinking about them and how much you treasure their friendship, or just their smile. You can send that in a card, either store bought or hand made by yourself. People are so lost these days in the real tradition of Christmas that they feel it is all in the gift and/or the price of the gift. A very sad thing.
I have always been the type of person to spend a few extra minutes and write what was in my heart when I sent cards out. Stores have very nice cards, but they can just seem to lack that personal touch. A hand made card will give them a special feeling and lets them know you took some extra time just for them.
Your gift, what ever it may be, should be a true show of your thoughts, and how special they are you. We all love to know that we are special in some way to others. If you want to send more than a card, then get inventive. Maybe you can support that certain someone in their desires to learn something new or add fun to their day. Throughout the year, if you were inquisitive enough, you may have stumbled onto their desire to start a new hobby or a new interest they wanted to start, but just never had that certain push to do it. You can be that push for them just buy making their gift a book or video with all the instructions they would need to fulfill that interest. There are all sorts of not so expensive craft kits out there also. Take a photograph of yourself being happy, or doing something silly. That is sure to send a very heart warming message and create a very nice smile.
Another way you can share your positive self-esteem is to simply invite a few friends over and bake some traditional ginger bread cookies, or a Christmas cake. Don't forget make some eggnog and share a Christmas baking cheer with each other. It's a very good Christmas feeling, one that is surely going to strengthen every ones self-esteem and Christmas cheer.
Remember to make time to visit your family and remind then how much you love them. It is after all Christmas time, a time of giving and spreading Christmas cheer. What better time to forget all the nonsensical family dynamics and just enjoy this special season as one heart and one appreciation of life.
Here is another way to put a nice self-esteem smile on a face.
Call someone that does not have a car and take them shopping with you. Maybe share a quaint bite to eat with them and tell them this is your Christmas Gift to them. They will surely remember this day. It's the people that expect nothing that really appreciate the smallest of gifts.
When did a good deed, hug or even just a smile and good cheer become so low on our Christmas List?
Are we only made to feel important by the value of a gift that we receive? That is such a sad notion. To show someone appreciation and love, is itself a true gift. It has no cash value. The value that it carries, is one of true positive meaning and the desire to make a person feel accepted and unique. How could this not make a persons self-esteem soar?
Christmas time is about giving and receiving.
When we give, we feel good in ourselves, so in actual fact we are receiving at the same time. We are receiving a positive feel of self-esteem, from the act of giving. To see a smile and to know that we have just made someone happy with our gift no matter how small it is, will definitely make us smile in return. Each of us who receives a gift, will experience those feelings of uniqueness. Our self esteem increases because we know that someone values us as a person. It is a true Christmas feeling, one that can spread positive self-esteem world wide.
Also, don't forget to treat yourself throughout the Christmas holidays!
Tell yourself that you deserve whatever your little heart desires.
Spoil yourself.
Take the opportunity to love yourself a little and thank God for who you are and for giving you His gift of life and be thankful for your family and your friends.
Remember to be thankful for the gift of Christmas! It truly is a day that brings everyone together to share their hugs and smiles! Lets all make our self-esteem a gift to give and receive.

I hope that this Christmas and your self esteem this holiday season, is the best one ever!

Christmas is a celebration of birth, so let us also celebrate the birth of a newer, stronger self-esteem, both for you and that special someone.

Merry Christmas to all, from all of us at http://www.womensselfesteem.com

Before I close this Christmas note...please visit this link to read .......
A Soldiers Christmas Message

~D~

Walking On Eggshells!

Has anyone ever told you, that's how they feel around you?

If they have, it's a huge red flag and one that should not be ignored. It needs to be dealt with immediately.

Our self-esteem is vital when we are in any type of relationship. Without a healthy self-esteem and self-confidence we will not be able to see our beauty as our partner does. Without that sight we will be blinded by every other women out there, seeing only their beauty. This is when the doubts and fears take over our thoughts and this is when jealousy is born and the eggshell syndrome begins!

Relationships are a tough challenging part of our lives. Especially when dealing with matters of the heart. As truly good as they make you feel, they can in turn tear you apart from the inside in a heartbeat. When the red flags start to rise up, that's when your relationship

is crying out for help. You need to address it, as if a baby was crying out to you.

When someone says they feel like they are walking on egg shells, what is that telling you? It's telling you :

• 
  
  that they can no longer be themselves in your presence.
• 
  
  that they fear your reaction whenever they speak.
• 
  
  that they are stuck, that they cannot move in either direction, for fear of upsetting you.
• 
  
  It is also telling you that they need to stop this feeling that is tearing them apart.

Many of us are guilty for creating these prison bars that surround our loved ones.

We do not even realize that our own fears are doing this to them. We are so caught up in our own self doubts that we are blind to the world that we have created for them.

Through our own fears we hear what they say in all the wrong languages. We interpret them through our weaknesses and turn what they say all upside down.

Some of us react irrationally, forcing our partner to either take cover and hide or even worse become irrational themselves. This is when we both become deaf and blind. When the relationship war begins, there are no winners, only victims. What once was love, kisses and smiles has turned into an ugly vicious battle ground of snarls, hate, and searching for the lowest hit we can aim for. Wow, how does this happen so fast? We as humans are notorious for ruining so many very good things out of pure bad habits.

No one wants to lose or be the one saying, "I am sorry" every five minutes, nor should a real relationship become a win/lose situation either. Who wants to walk on egg shells? Then again, no one wants to have to defend their every breathe to someone they thought loved them unconditionally and are committed to. Walking on egg shells sucks!

If we cannot be ourselves with the one we love, then who can we be that with? This is not to say that a person should disrespect the other. When you know that something troubles the other person or makes them feel truly uncomfortable, it should go without saying that it is just not done. That is true respect. Why would you want to do something to hurt your best friend or even make your loved one feel out of place?

In new relationships it does take time to get things organized as in any new situation. Moving into a new house, a new job, having a baby, or even planning a trip, we have to reorganize to accommodate our now lives. Committing to another person is just the beginning of the book. It is just the title. Now you have to write the story and yes, make a few corrections along the way on both parts, but the trick is to constantly compare each others notes. Remember this: staying on the same page is what your relationship is all about.

When we make a commitment to another person through love, we are taking on a responsibility to share our love and life with that person. We are silently telling them that we are now going to take in consideration their feelings as well as our own.

Your once single-self life has now become a two-self life. This does not mean that you stop breathing and living. It just means that you are now sharing your life with this chosen person. It opens up a whole new world of respect. Remember also that you cannot gain respect if you do not offer respect. Life becomes a definite two-way street when two hearts are involved. There are also two minds working in this relationship now; two minds that are of opposite genders, two minds that will collide now and then. This is not a bad thing. We need to have differences to add spice to our lives.

Be very careful of starting the "Poor Me", habit. This is another relationship red flag to watch for. Remember, walking on egg shells? If one partner becomes so caught up in their own worries and fails to share this with their partner, it will sneak in between you both and begin to build a very strong wall of negative habits. If you have read any of my other articles, you will know these negative habits well, jealousy, mistrust, low self-esteem all add up to total loneliness.

When your partner begins to feel they are slipping away from you, grab on and do not for a minute take that red flag for granted. Listen hard to their worries and love them more, not necessarily better. Just show more of your love. If they keep slipping away, then there is either nothing left to save or they need help outside of your relationship.

It is so important to know your partner. Only then can you realize when they are in trouble. Do not allow your relationship to become the wallpaper in your house. No one wants to be a wallflower. No one with any self-respect that is.

Another great phrase I hear all the time is, "Door Mat syndrome". Oh this is a very bad thing for couples to allow to take hold of their relationship. In many cases one partner has taken hold of it and falls into a control habit. This is something that plagues many relationships. When does one partner become the owner? I will use that word because it shows possession and control. This happens because it can. Some one has allowed this ownership to take place. STOP allowing this, please. A partnership, relationship, commitment, whatever you want to call it, is an EQUAL understanding of respect and love. There are no owners and no bosses. No one is above the other. Man should respect woman and vice-verse. This is a must in order to make a relationship strong enough to not allow negative habits any control.

When there are no negative habits, there is no walking on eggshells. How much more simpler can it get. We are an intelligent species, so let us act intelligent when we decide to commit to another person. This is two lives we are dealing with here, not just another Hollywood movie. We are all going to age and all of us are going to notice our body parts going south. Guess what, no one is above that law. When you have found a true love and are willing to invest your life with that person, please do not allow material things or negative fantasy ideals to come between you. It really is not worth it.

When you feel unsure of something or you feel negative emotions taking control of your mind, reach out to your partner. Don't walk on egg shells. Do not turn it into a war against your partner. Use all of your love to fight the negative relationship habits. Love is worth it. We all have our good and bad days. Some have more than others. So when it's a good day, then make it a really good day. Those are always remembered the longest. Don't walk on egg shells. We have to love ourselves first, then and only then can we love another!

DorothyL

http://www.womensselfesteem.com

Sex, women, men... Sex, orgasms, feelings... Sex, cunnilingus, fellatio...Cuddles!

If you are wondering what I am going to share with you tonight, then you are definitely in need of this article, especially after reading my teaser up there. I have shared many of my thoughts with you during the past few months. Mostly about females why`s and woe`s. I have had many men request that I give them more information on exactly what women like in the sex, and feelings department.

There are many sites out there that are about dating, relationships, how to score, how to win, and yet men are still looking for answers. Why is that? Maybe it`s because not every answer fits every women! That may be your first hint guys. We are all different, what works on one women will make another women slap your face with disgust. So I would think that a good thing to do is to just chat a bit with the lady and get to know the side of her that she is willing to show you. Hopefully you are smart enough to listen to her, and learn as she talks. Oh, and please save the checking out her boobs or her butt until after you have won the first battle.

I truly believe men are so quickly blinded by our physical protrusions (wink) that they immediately lose their focus at first base. Guys, the body parts are not going anywhere. Have some class and be patient. OK, enough about that very somber subject. I will leave that for another show, as they say.

Women's feelings, as most men have already experienced are nothing to joke about. Women are hormonal and sensitive creatures and at the same time very strong. Those three characteristics are nothing short of explosive. The beneficial side to these hard to deal with emotions is that women are just as equally passionate and loving toward the male gender. It is our passion that fuels our desires to be wanted by men. We send off certain signals that entice and attract men. Women know exactly how to win a mans heart. Remember, we are the more sensitive feeling being, of the two genders. We also deal with hormones that turn us into monsters one minute and little tiny babies in another. Our feelings are usually on the top of our skin. That's why we get hurt so much easier than men. We are child bearers, and that instinctively causes us to be more cautious and rely on our intuitions more than facts. So guys , please forgive us for being the more feeling human. Do not hate us for it, or get frustrated with us, but love us and know that for all the pain we share, we also share twice as much pleasure. That brings me to my next thought!

Sex, that is definitely a good thought not to mention a very fun act between men and women. Women love to be touched, and felt. She wants to feel your hands on her body. It is a very important physical connection that sends messages to her most intimate senses. When a man touches a woman's body, she feels wanted, she feels lusted, she feels craved, but most of all she feels SEXY! Her self-esteem will ROAR! That my dear sweet men, is exactly the point you want her at. You want her to feel SEXY!

Remember, we are all different. Educate yourself with our differences, respect that and you will achieve what you desire!

Women do vary with having their breasts touched and played with. This should be done gently at first, so to not turn her off.

Some women love a very passionate kiss. A passionate kiss can be an instant orgasm for some or just the beginning for others.

Women love to feel the sensation of your breathe on their skin. That will surely send her to a new level of sensations.

Women have very sensitive backs. A women's spine will tingle with the slightest touch of your finger tips.

Kiss her shoulders, please.

Kiss her belly!

Kiss her thighs, that is another very sweet spot for women! Kiss her between her legs! She will be warm already, anticipating the sensation of your tongue! It is a very sweet way to taste the women that you desire! She will feel that much more open to you, knowing that you want every part of her body!

Women`s bodies have so many sensations that it does take a bit more time to get them to orgasm. The more sensations that you can get a women to feel, the higher she will go into her orgasm zones. Spend time tasting her, never rush her. Also please do not wear out just one spot. Women know their good spots, ask her to tell you what feels good. Be patient though, women do have a harder time talking about sex. Listen to her moans, read her body language, feel her wetness. All these are signs being sent to you. That's a plus for you also. The more orgasmic a women feels, the more adventurous she will be when it is you she wants to devour.

Remember, to tell her how SEXY she is and how sweet she tastes! Let her know how good she feels to you. Let her know that she is driving you crazy. Women can be driven wild just by those comments during sex. When men are quiet during sex, women feel that they are not exciting or sexy. Women need to hear that men want them and want to please them. When women feel they are wanted, that in turn makes them want to please their man. HMMM! Where do you think my thoughts are going now?

On the flip side.... Women also love to please their men. They know that men crave fellatio, better know to most as ,"Blow-jobs". (Smilz) Yes guys we know, we know. Women search and read more that you know on just how to give their guy the best BJ. There are just as many books out there and sites on the Internet about that as there are about how to please a woman. My hint to all the women wondering out there is...PRACTICE!!!! Body language from your man is a must to watch for. Not all men are the same. Some men are more sensitive in some areas that others. Just as women are also on different levels of sensations when it comes to oral sex.

Another good tip ladies is your thoughts at the time of the Bj.

Think sex.

Think wet.

Think suction.

Think swallowing

Think warm.

Think HIM!!

Love him!!

But most of all suck him like you want it.

The more he feels that you are just absolutely crazy for it, the more intense it is for him. Do not be afraid of what you are doing. You cannot hurt him unless you bite. That's a NO! NO!.... DO NOT BITE or SCRAPE! :) Don`t be afraid to ask him how it feels, or if there is anything more you can do to please him.

I stress he wants to know that you are also enjoying this action as you want to know when he is doing you!

Communication, as in anything, is important in sex. It is after all, something that we want to enjoy with one another. Also we learn more about each other through sharing our physical desires. Ladies another very huge turn on for your man is when he sees you feel SEXY! When a man sees his woman sexy, confident and open to him, it will totally send him over the edge of lust for you. So lets get SEXY!!

When all is said and done, Cuddles is a biggie. We need to cuddle. It reassures us that everything was perfect. It's kind of like the icing on the cake. It bonds us on another level of communication. Some women and men have their best conversations when they cuddle. It is almost like a surrender of weapons.

Well these are my thoughts on this. I hope I have not offended anyone. I know this is a different subject than what you are use to reading. But I am human also, just like you. Also I wanted to show a little attitude of a different color for my readers.

Enjoy life and enjoy all of its benefits!

We only get one shot at it!

Men and Women are made to enjoy each other!

So just do it!

~D~

http://www.womensselfesteem.com