Monday, September 5, 2011

PORNOGRAPHY...should I or shouldn't I?

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Ahhh yes... the game of porn..the topic that has raised more that just ones sexual desires. Not only has it been known to be fuel for many addictive personalities, it has been known to play devils advocate between many partners throughout the years. Pornography has been around since the early 1900's and will be around for a long time as will any other of mans prosperous inventions. Pornography is not about romance, nor is it just about 2 adult people having sex...it is raw, it warps ones realities,  it involves multiple numbers of people, including children and even animals. It will captivate and imprison many viewers that have the slightest addictive characteristic. There are no limits to what people will do to make money and pornography is a clear sign of that. It most definitely shows the level of weakness that a human-being can be brought down to. How can anyone say that pornography is a good thing?

Unfortunately pornography is not just a picture of a sexy and beautiful girl or a washboard-abs tanned and/or a sweaty, but very hot guy, it is a form of entertainment that has caused serious complications in relationships.
I have touched on the topic of pornography many times throughout my articles, more so due to the fact that contrary to popular belief, it is not something for everybody and it has played a huge role in causing problems between partners. Pornography is a huge money maker, that we all agree on. What we do not all agree on is, should we or shouldn't be part of it in any way, shape or form?
When we are talking relationships, these are a few questions that should be addressed between partners such as:
...are you even aware of the fact that your partner is uncomfortable watching porn with you or watching you watch porn?
...do you even care if he/she is uncomfortable?
...have you expressed your feelings towards watching porn with your partner, so that they can be aware of how you feel?
....is watching pornography something you need in order to have desires for your partner?
There are many partners that find themselves caught in the trap of feeling very uncomfortable with the fact that their partners are very much into watching pornography. This feeling, if unaddressed, can and will become a huge battle within the field of ones self-esteem and confidence. If the person experiencing these uncomfortable feelings does not attempt to share them with her/his partner, they are in fact, indirectly allowing negativity into the relationship.
It is each partners responsibility to communicate any and all feelings whether they are positive or negative to each other. That is called communication and that is one of the vital keys to a successful and happy relationship. If you have taken all of the necessary steps in sharing your thoughts on porn to your partner and he/she continues to ignore them or blatantly not care, then it is a sure sign that this partner is not for you.
AS always, when it comes to relationships, my first words of advice are, "BE responsible for your own happiness and  also BE responsible in communicating your thoughts with your partner. You are not a mind reader and neither is your partner. When you are in the getting to know you stage of a relationship... it is very important to be wise as to what your potential partners likes and dislikes are all about. Try to lift those love/lust blinders now and then and really see that person for who they are.
Bottom line, we are all responsible for our decisions and our actions in our relationships. If you do not want to compromise in any of your habits or choices, my advice to you is to steer clear of ever committing to a relationship.
As far as pornography is concerned...should you or shouldn't you....do what you feel comfortable with and not a bit less than that~

 ~ A successful relationship is all about a balance of communication and compromise ~

~ DorothyL ~

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